Feeling and being alone is something I’m used to, the planetary dynamics the dark asylum of my 12th house is an odd mix when you’re Leo-ing (to use Steven Forrest’s term). Leo is ruled by the Sun, it has to shine but how does it do so in the dungeon of the 12th?

The purpose of being born under a Leo Sun is to create something in your life that can be seen by others, an honest reflection of what is going on inside, demonstrated on the outside for the purpose of receiving feedback in key Leo events like romance, play, speculation, teaching or having children.  Your success at Leo-ing isn’t measured by the output, it’s the process of learning how to do this and learning how to appreciate all the ugly and beautiful details the process of creativity holds.  Everyone is Leo-ing somewhere in their astrological chart.  But mine works in the dark and alone in the 12th house.  And like Scorpio and Aquarius Sun signs, Leo is fixed.  Remember? Creativity needed a club-over-the-head approach to wake me up.

Returning from London, I threw myself into writing details that no one wants to know about.  Suffice it to say, most stories begin with a well-laid plan.  Mine didn’t.  But the ideas just kept coming, expanding the original 250 pages into what was now five books.  I had to back up and lay out each character’s story lines and Rules, the concepts I wanted to cover, the questions I wanted to ask to illuminate the hidden answers for all to see by book nine.  I had to make sure the things unfolded in the right order but most importantly, I had to find my writing voice, not the cleverly disguised one I had been using.

I thought it would take a few weeks.  Not. Notes filled many journals, ideas and theories that I had since I was a little girl; my world view. I was in creative overdrive, things that wouldn’t have stood a chance to be captured in the early days of writing this book received a clarity that frequently brought tears to my eyes.   Those early days were used to give me the confidence to learn how to write.  Now my days demanded the same kind of commitment, but this time it was to my honesty to share my deepest thoughts and convictions.  I’ve not shared this stuff with anyone.  No, not even him.

In January of 2016, I did another ‘edit’, re-writing major sections, weaving things together differently, expanding on things I had only skimmed in the previous versions.  Chainsaw in hand, I cut out major sections including James and Kathryn’s walk past Grosvenor House.  On others, the chisel was employed to refine the Jane Austen weekend and the sex scenes.  All the while, new ideas were added but I was a much different writer by now.

I had developed my own writing process, abandoning much of what I learned through other’s books.  The answers on how to write were inside me.  All I had to do was ask. My only fear: letting another person read it from beginning to end.  Would they get what I was trying to say?

The first book was still without a title. But one thing I knew was that everyone who read it would pull something different out of it.  Some would see it only as a romance novel and others would just enjoy the humor of it all.  Some would be more intrigued by the questions Kathryn asks and the more esoteric themes of the book, searching themselves to understand the mysteries of life, why we behave the way we do and what lies behind the choices we make, smart ones and those not so smart.

There would also be those that were a hybrid of these, inspired by the life journey of characters they can relate to.

Working up the nerve to submit the book for it’s first edit, the editing company wanted to know where my book fell in the literary world’s commonly accepted genres.  I knew it wasn’t horror, it has romance in it but its suspenseful, it enters the world of the paranormal when the previous incarnations of Kathryn, James and others are explored.  But it’s also inspirational since you’re finding out how to touch that divine part of yourself that knows all the answers and then, well you get the rest.  My book crosses all the lines of genres created by the publishing industry.  Frankly, I was just astounded I had written the darn thing.  Couldn’t they just read it on that merit?  No.  Not even if you’re paying them a small fortune to read it? No. They want to know the genre.  I decided:  women’s fiction.  They assigned a young woman on the team to read the book.  For the sake of the story, let’s call her Constance.  She was going to assess my ‘David’.